Merry Christmas to one and all, and a peaceful, happy and safe New Year!
Christmas blessings,
Audrey
Tuesday, December 25, 2012
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Barricade putter-uppers, ayuh
A few days before Christmas, that time when we look and see the sacred in life around us, Henri Nouwen notes that Quite often out of an intimate encounter with God, encounters with other human beings become possible...If you are the beloved of God, and if you start thinking about other people's lives, you start realizing that they are as beloved as you are.
Hmmm. Another reminder that Jesus didn't come to leave us alone.
Jesus did not come just to tell us that we are doing such a great job that no adjustments are necessary. While he came to tell us that God loves us as we are, he also revelaed that God does not leave us as we are. Jesus came to make a difference in our lives.
And one place where that difference is struggling to be made has to do with the barriers that people like you and I erect between ourselves and other people...those other beloved people Nouwen invites us to think about today. We like those barriers we build. They give us some measure of control. They tell us who we are and who we are not. They tell us that we are separate from each other, maybe a little better, which makes us feel good. They also simplify our lives by not letting others get too, too close.
We like the barriers and so we keep erecting new ones. We're good barricade putter-uppers. But God is just not into barriers, including barriers between us and him. Jesus's life was about removing our separation from God's hopes and God's beloved people.
If we would welcome the Christ child, then let us remove the barriers and boundaries that divide us from one another. Look around, you might see a few that could come down. God in our lives and homes and parish and community loves us as we are, but does not leave us as we are.
Friday, December 21, 2012
Before We Were Born...
Today marks a week since the hideous events in Newtown, Connecticut, and at 9:30 this morning many churches across the country, including St. Alban's, will be ringing bells to remember those who were killed on that tragic day. I have read that there is some controversy over how many times the bells should be rung - 26 times, for the little children, still babies, really, and for the brave teachers and administrators who tried to save them? 27 times, to include the mother of the killer? 28 times to include the killer himself?
As I read Henri Nouen's offering for today it got me thinking about love, and about forgiveness, two words that ring out during Advent and that ring out in the gospels. We are told of God's extravagant love for his creation, of God's willingness to forgive those who lose their way. The prophets Isaiah and Jeremiah remind us that God knew us before we were born, and saw the potential in each of us, that God loved us even then. How we human beings have struggled over the centuries with this notion of God's love and forgiveness!
Could God love Adam Lanza, with his hideous deeds of last Friday? Could God possibly forgive such horror? I think the answer is yes, God loves this young man, but abhors, as do we all, what he did. Can God forgive him? I think the answer to that is yes, as well. Do we struggle with that? Yes; I think if we are completely honest with ourselves, yes we do. Right now I am so shattered with sadness, so agonizing for the families of all those who died, so angry at Adam Lanza, so angry at our country's lack of strict control of automatic weapons, so angry that we do so little for those suffering from mental illness, that forgiveness for any of it seems far off to me.
But we are called to forgive, aren't we? We are called to love. We may feel precious little of either love or forgiveness right now, but our task is before us: to try. We may not understand God's ways; we may not even like God's ways sometimes, but we can at the same time thank God for those ways. We none of us, pray God, will ever do anything close to what that troubled young man did last Friday, but we all, each and every one of us, stand in need of God's love and of God's forgiveness. Maybe that is what we need to hold before us today even as we remember those lives that were lost a week ago.
God's blessing be with you,
Audrey
As I read Henri Nouen's offering for today it got me thinking about love, and about forgiveness, two words that ring out during Advent and that ring out in the gospels. We are told of God's extravagant love for his creation, of God's willingness to forgive those who lose their way. The prophets Isaiah and Jeremiah remind us that God knew us before we were born, and saw the potential in each of us, that God loved us even then. How we human beings have struggled over the centuries with this notion of God's love and forgiveness!
Could God love Adam Lanza, with his hideous deeds of last Friday? Could God possibly forgive such horror? I think the answer is yes, God loves this young man, but abhors, as do we all, what he did. Can God forgive him? I think the answer to that is yes, as well. Do we struggle with that? Yes; I think if we are completely honest with ourselves, yes we do. Right now I am so shattered with sadness, so agonizing for the families of all those who died, so angry at Adam Lanza, so angry at our country's lack of strict control of automatic weapons, so angry that we do so little for those suffering from mental illness, that forgiveness for any of it seems far off to me.
But we are called to forgive, aren't we? We are called to love. We may feel precious little of either love or forgiveness right now, but our task is before us: to try. We may not understand God's ways; we may not even like God's ways sometimes, but we can at the same time thank God for those ways. We none of us, pray God, will ever do anything close to what that troubled young man did last Friday, but we all, each and every one of us, stand in need of God's love and of God's forgiveness. Maybe that is what we need to hold before us today even as we remember those lives that were lost a week ago.
God's blessing be with you,
Audrey
Thursday, December 20, 2012
Cooking Up Some Clarity
In mid October, my mother came to stay with me to await the birth of my niece. My mom is an excellent cook, but this is not a trait that has traveled down the family line to me. Somehow, some folks are able to make tossing a meal together look like the easiest, simplest thing in the world. I always get frazzled while cooking, unable to multi-task in that particular forum, and by the end of it the kitchen looks like a warzone and everything is slightly overdone.
So on the day my mother arrived, she offered to cook dinner, and I gratefully accepted. She was making something relatively simple, and she handily improvised every time she needed a piece of basic kitchen equipment that I didn’t own. All of this was humming along smoothly, until she asked me for the salt. I pointed to the pinch bowl on my counter. Empty. I went to the cabinet where I thought I remembered storing a box of kosher when I moved in. Nothing. My mother looked at me somewhat mournfully. “You don’t even have salt?”
I tried to explain that cooking was complicated and took up a lot of time and I was really very busy running around between two congregations so most of the time I’d just pick something up on the way home because there was always something else to do. It all sounded like a good excuse in my head, but my mom pointed out to me just how unhealthy these habits are. She also pointed out that I wasn’t going to be any good to anyone at either of my congregations if I got sick because I eat poorly or was overly stressed because I was broke. She was trying to give me a lesson in putting first things first.
It’s similar to what Nouwen says about placing the urgent before the important, echoing what a mentor of mine refers to as “the tyranny of the urgent.” How often do we wake up in the morning and think, “ah, today I have to get X important thing accomplished,” and then we find ourself going to bed at night thinking, “Somehow I didn’t have time for that, where did my day go?” We run around doing a million different things, and we overlook basic but critical tasks like taking good care of ourselves.
Our minds get all cluttered up, and then it becomes hard to see the most important thing in the closet through all the crud we’ve stashed in there. Somehow we need to be able to get rid of the clutter, to clean things up, to purify our minds so that we can see the important rather than get distracted by the urgent. The talk of purification in the Bible can sometimes seem so heavy and even judgmental, but I think “purification” is really just about clarity of purpose. Clarity of priorities. Getting rid of the clutter to focus on taking care of ourselves and others, “so that you have genuine mutual love, loving one another deeply from the heart.”
So I encourage you to get rid of some of your clutter today. Me? I’m going to release feeling compelled to watch the obsessive news tonight. And then I’m going to ignore Nouwen’s suggestion to skip the salt, and bust out that pinch bowl of kosher to cook a healthy dinner instead. Any recipe suggestions?
So on the day my mother arrived, she offered to cook dinner, and I gratefully accepted. She was making something relatively simple, and she handily improvised every time she needed a piece of basic kitchen equipment that I didn’t own. All of this was humming along smoothly, until she asked me for the salt. I pointed to the pinch bowl on my counter. Empty. I went to the cabinet where I thought I remembered storing a box of kosher when I moved in. Nothing. My mother looked at me somewhat mournfully. “You don’t even have salt?”
I tried to explain that cooking was complicated and took up a lot of time and I was really very busy running around between two congregations so most of the time I’d just pick something up on the way home because there was always something else to do. It all sounded like a good excuse in my head, but my mom pointed out to me just how unhealthy these habits are. She also pointed out that I wasn’t going to be any good to anyone at either of my congregations if I got sick because I eat poorly or was overly stressed because I was broke. She was trying to give me a lesson in putting first things first.
It’s similar to what Nouwen says about placing the urgent before the important, echoing what a mentor of mine refers to as “the tyranny of the urgent.” How often do we wake up in the morning and think, “ah, today I have to get X important thing accomplished,” and then we find ourself going to bed at night thinking, “Somehow I didn’t have time for that, where did my day go?” We run around doing a million different things, and we overlook basic but critical tasks like taking good care of ourselves.
Our minds get all cluttered up, and then it becomes hard to see the most important thing in the closet through all the crud we’ve stashed in there. Somehow we need to be able to get rid of the clutter, to clean things up, to purify our minds so that we can see the important rather than get distracted by the urgent. The talk of purification in the Bible can sometimes seem so heavy and even judgmental, but I think “purification” is really just about clarity of purpose. Clarity of priorities. Getting rid of the clutter to focus on taking care of ourselves and others, “so that you have genuine mutual love, loving one another deeply from the heart.”
So I encourage you to get rid of some of your clutter today. Me? I’m going to release feeling compelled to watch the obsessive news tonight. And then I’m going to ignore Nouwen’s suggestion to skip the salt, and bust out that pinch bowl of kosher to cook a healthy dinner instead. Any recipe suggestions?
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
Claiming the Peace of God...in the real and broken world
When I conceived of this little project of an Advent blog about reclaiming the Peace of God as we prepare for Christmas, three words I never imagined using here were “military assault rifle.”
With some conviction I stood with you on the floor of the St. Alban’s nave last Sunday and said in response to the question of “Where is God in this tragedy?” that God is in our response to the hurricane and to the earthquake and to the unspeakable tragedy. I believe that is true. God is in our response of holding children close, of applauding their best efforts, of nurturing them in times of joy and of trouble. God is in our response in reaching out in compassion to the families of victims of violence and in our prayers for the new little angels on the streets of heaven.
And God is in our response to the question that the seekers asked John the Baptist in the lesson for the Third Sunday in Advent. As he preached the need for repentance, those who came to John asked: "What then should we do?"
What then, what now, should we do? What should I do?
I’ve been freshly convinced that I should join the fight, and a fight it will be, to ban the production and sale of military-style assault weapons.
Unexpectedly, this Advent this may well be the most urgent need, and the most fruitful opportunity, if we’re serious about reclaiming the Peace of God. I can’t imagine that God, coming freshly into our midst this Christmas, will be anything but appalled at the arming of our communities with these weapons of destruction. Weapons which again and again have proved, in the hands of the disturbed, to be uniquely lethal to the lives of God’s innocents.
In the days ahead, I won’t claim to speak for you, but I will speak as a parish priest and a pastor to families at risk of these machines-for-death that are of no earthly value. No one hunts a deer with a weapon designed for war. Maine is, per capita, one of the most heavily armed jurisdictions in the world. In our nation of 300 million people there are more than 300 million guns. In some communities is it more difficult to adopt a stray dog than it is to buy an assault weapon with high capacity clips of deadly, rapid firing ammunition. It literally makes no sense.
Our Maine legislators are on the fence. None of them has yet been an effective advocate for common sense gun legislation, including reinstituting the ban on assault weapons. Let’s go see them. Let’s write to them. Let’s tell them about reclaiming the Peace of God. Let’s tell them about Maine children at risk of exactly what happened at Sandy Hook School on Friday.
The time is right. The time is now. "What then should we do?" We should dedicate ourselves to sensible gun control legislation so that we never again witness the horror and tragedy of the slaughter of the innocents inflicted on Newtown, Connecticut last week.
Henri Nouwen today calls us to read again Paul’s letter to the Philippians, Let each of you look not to your own interests, but to the interests of others. Let the same mind be in you that was in Christ Jesus…
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
Open to the Love
Today's readings from Nouen ring so very true. We live in a world that imposes an endless list of "ifs" on us every single day. If we do this right we will get that. If we play the game well we will get the reward. If we behave this way or that we will be loved. We can drive ourselves crazy trying to fulfill the "ifs" upon which hang the acceptance, admiration and love of the world. Perhaps that is one reason there are so many desperately hurting, unhappy and dangerous people out there - those people who simply cannot or will not live up to what the world expects of them; those whom the world therefore rejects.
We can search this world over and not find truly, absolutely unconditional love -except perhaps in our dogs- those glorious creatures who seem to love and accept us no matter what! But we human beings have a harder time loving without those "ifs" creeping in. We impose, however subtly, those "ifs" on other people, and we impose those "ifs" on ourselves as well.
Wouldn't it be wonderful, and revolutionary, if we could truly believe that God loves us without those worldly "ifs"? We hear all the time that God loves us, that he forgives us, that we are his Beloved Ones. But oh, how hard it is for us to understand and believe that! God's ways, we know, are not our ways, but we can't seem to wrap our heads and hearts around the idea that we are loved no matter what. How can this be? There must be a trick.
But there is no trick. As we move through Advent and toward Christmas, as we hear the age-old story of Christ's birth, as we look into that manger we see a manifestation of love that is really beyond our comprehension, but which calls us to open our hearts to it, to rest in it, to trust in it.
Nouen asks us to try, for today, to try to believe in God's unconditional love. Let's do that together. Let's open our hearts to the kind of love that is hard for us to understand, but which can transform us in ways we cannot even imagine.
God's love and peace be with you this Advent season,
Audrey
We can search this world over and not find truly, absolutely unconditional love -except perhaps in our dogs- those glorious creatures who seem to love and accept us no matter what! But we human beings have a harder time loving without those "ifs" creeping in. We impose, however subtly, those "ifs" on other people, and we impose those "ifs" on ourselves as well.
Wouldn't it be wonderful, and revolutionary, if we could truly believe that God loves us without those worldly "ifs"? We hear all the time that God loves us, that he forgives us, that we are his Beloved Ones. But oh, how hard it is for us to understand and believe that! God's ways, we know, are not our ways, but we can't seem to wrap our heads and hearts around the idea that we are loved no matter what. How can this be? There must be a trick.
But there is no trick. As we move through Advent and toward Christmas, as we hear the age-old story of Christ's birth, as we look into that manger we see a manifestation of love that is really beyond our comprehension, but which calls us to open our hearts to it, to rest in it, to trust in it.
Nouen asks us to try, for today, to try to believe in God's unconditional love. Let's do that together. Let's open our hearts to the kind of love that is hard for us to understand, but which can transform us in ways we cannot even imagine.
God's love and peace be with you this Advent season,
Audrey
Monday, December 17, 2012
Victory Wreaths
I have really enjoyed sprucing up my new home for the holiday season. I have my advent candles, some poinsettias, what my family keeps calling a “Charlie Brown Christmas tree,” and two wreaths...one on the door and one above the mantel. I love the fragrant smell of those greens, but I have to admit that I had no idea until today’s reading from our Nouwen book the history of Christmas wreaths. A quick google search confirmed it. Wreaths were used as a sign of victory in the Roman empire, and early Christians co-opted this tradition to proclaim the victory of Christ.
It’s hard to sit with the image of Christ Victorious right now, especially as the nation continues to mourn the tragedy in Newtown. Nouwen tells us that the heart of Christ is a human heart, one that is big enough to hold all human loneliness and anguish. There is no doubt that Jesus’ heart is anguished in these days. Nouwen lists a series of contrasting things in order to illustrate that Christ does not distinguish between the two. I found myself wishing that he had listed “healthy and unhealthy” or “well and unwell” in that list. Particularly, the tragedy in Newtown has put the mental health crisis in our country on my heart and mind. There are millions in America (and around the world) who struggle with anxiety, depression, addiction, eating disorders, personality disorders...the list goes on and on. And we’re not talking about it enough.
Parents and grandparents and really anyone who cares about kids may be asking themselves how they can best support their young people in the wake of this tragedy. You may have been able to shield them from some of it over the weekend, but today they’ll be back in school and may hear other things. Here’s a link to a website with helpful, age-appropriate tips on how to respond to your kids’ questions or concerns. And if they ask you about God’s presence or absence in times like these, point to your wreath. Thousands of years ago, a persecuted Christian minority with no obvious reason to hope for the future hung their wreaths to proclaim the victory, authority, and power of Christ in the midst of devastating times. These days, we do the same.
It’s hard to sit with the image of Christ Victorious right now, especially as the nation continues to mourn the tragedy in Newtown. Nouwen tells us that the heart of Christ is a human heart, one that is big enough to hold all human loneliness and anguish. There is no doubt that Jesus’ heart is anguished in these days. Nouwen lists a series of contrasting things in order to illustrate that Christ does not distinguish between the two. I found myself wishing that he had listed “healthy and unhealthy” or “well and unwell” in that list. Particularly, the tragedy in Newtown has put the mental health crisis in our country on my heart and mind. There are millions in America (and around the world) who struggle with anxiety, depression, addiction, eating disorders, personality disorders...the list goes on and on. And we’re not talking about it enough.
Parents and grandparents and really anyone who cares about kids may be asking themselves how they can best support their young people in the wake of this tragedy. You may have been able to shield them from some of it over the weekend, but today they’ll be back in school and may hear other things. Here’s a link to a website with helpful, age-appropriate tips on how to respond to your kids’ questions or concerns. And if they ask you about God’s presence or absence in times like these, point to your wreath. Thousands of years ago, a persecuted Christian minority with no obvious reason to hope for the future hung their wreaths to proclaim the victory, authority, and power of Christ in the midst of devastating times. These days, we do the same.
Sunday, December 16, 2012
At Advent ...looking for the healing
There
is nothing in the wounds of the human condition that cannot be healed by the
power and love of God.
I hope these words can give
some comfort to all those hurting so deeply.
It may not seem so on some
mornings, but our God created us good to share with him in shaping and
reshaping creation, in bringing some sense of harmony, in reconciling people
and families, and in making whole that which is deeply broken.
This morning at St. Alban’s,
our thrilling Christmas pageant was presented with all the life and joy that
forty-one angels and shepherds and wise men and a holy family can offer.
Today was all about our
children …those who are here with us and those who are not.
Somehow the healing that’s so
needed will come. In Advent we talk a lot about looking and waiting for God in
our midst. Well, healing is a first manifestation of God’s presence. The basic
premise about healing, the first thing to know, is that all healing comes from
God.
We are imperfect and often
broken things who inhabit an imperfect and broken world. One of the genius
traits of the human heart lies in its God-given capacity to know this brokenness
and yet generate insight, energy and new life.
Healed life.
Our faith is not a protective shield
against trouble. We will have moments of real loss, moments of being those lost
sheep in deep need of a good shepherd.
The nation feels such loss these days
following Friday’s tragic chaos at Sandy Hook School. And through tears, I have been asked where God
is in this trouble?
I pray that God is in our response when the hurricanes come, when the earth shakes and the tragedy is unspeakable. At these times what God does promise and what God does deliver are strength and hope and healing, those very same things that with their simplicity and dignity and humility the children show us we need.
We are given God’s strength to deal with the harshness of life. We are given God’s healing when the way is unclear or is full of deep trouble. And we are given hope for the final peace-filled gathering of all things and all people in the arms of God. This is the peace, the promise and hope of God for us and for all families that is coming at Christmas. It is what we await at Advent.
This world and our living in it do not
always make sense to us. Wonder, mystery, confusion and even chaos and cruelty
are our frequent companions, so we need God’s guidance. And no life is complete
in and of itself, so we need somehow to know God’s hopes for us.
That, in reality, is what we need and
that, thank God, is what we have been given.
I so wish I could explain the tragedy
that numbs our hearts, but I cannot. I wish I could affirm that secret desire
we all have for complete protection from suffering, but I cannot. What I can confidently
do is promise you those things that the lives of children remind us we need,
God’s strength, guidance, healing and hope.
Our pageant gave us again a remarkable
story, told freshly by our remarkable young story-tellers, each of whom
continues to learn (with us) their place in the story, their place in the
healing and illuminating touch of God.
Today is all about the children…and us
too.
Speak
through the earthquake, wind and fire, O still, small voice of calm.
Friday, December 14, 2012
Holy Listening
Anyone going through the ordination process in the Episcopal Church is required to take a unit of Clinical Pastoral Education, usually at a hospital. I did mine at the Maine Medical Center 25 years ago. CPE involves intense study, working individually and as a group with the supervisor, writing, and visiting with patients.
One of the first patients I saw was a dear older lady who was very ill with cancer. As we sat together she began telling me about her pain and her fear. Earlier on I had noticed many pictures of her grandchildren lined up on the window sill, so I asked her about them. Soon we were talking about more cheerful things. When I left her room I was pleased that the visit had gone so well.
My supervisor was not so pleased. "Why did you ask about the grandchildren?" he asked.
"Well, I wanted to make her feel better, to take her mind off her problems."
"You weren't listening to her," he said.
"Yes, but..."
"Audrey, you weren't listening to what she was trying to tell you."
He was right. I wasn't listening to her. I was listening instead to my own agenda, to my desire to save the day, to make all the bad things disappear and to cheer her up. She wanted, and needed, to tell me what was going on in her heart and I didn't hear it.
As we moved further along in CPE I learned about listening with a "third ear." Really, truly listening not only with two ears but with that third ear that picks up nuances, that hears even a tiny catch in the throat, a wistfulness, a sadness; that is tuned into things that are left unsaid. It is about ushering God in and showing ourselves out the door of these conversations. It is holy listening - holy listening with our third ear - holy listening to each other, and to our God.
Peace be with you all,
Audrey
One of the first patients I saw was a dear older lady who was very ill with cancer. As we sat together she began telling me about her pain and her fear. Earlier on I had noticed many pictures of her grandchildren lined up on the window sill, so I asked her about them. Soon we were talking about more cheerful things. When I left her room I was pleased that the visit had gone so well.
My supervisor was not so pleased. "Why did you ask about the grandchildren?" he asked.
"Well, I wanted to make her feel better, to take her mind off her problems."
"You weren't listening to her," he said.
"Yes, but..."
"Audrey, you weren't listening to what she was trying to tell you."
He was right. I wasn't listening to her. I was listening instead to my own agenda, to my desire to save the day, to make all the bad things disappear and to cheer her up. She wanted, and needed, to tell me what was going on in her heart and I didn't hear it.
As we moved further along in CPE I learned about listening with a "third ear." Really, truly listening not only with two ears but with that third ear that picks up nuances, that hears even a tiny catch in the throat, a wistfulness, a sadness; that is tuned into things that are left unsaid. It is about ushering God in and showing ourselves out the door of these conversations. It is holy listening - holy listening with our third ear - holy listening to each other, and to our God.
Peace be with you all,
Audrey
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Authentic Relationships
“Jesus asks for a single-minded commitment to God and God alone.
God wants all of our heart, all of our mind, and all of our soul.”
Gosh, today’s reading from Henri Nouwen really strikes a nerve with me. I think about my family and friends, all the people that I deeply love in my life - I’m supposed to love God more than all of them? I think of my sister and her partner and my six week old baby niece (Colby Jane Sunshine!), and I wonder how I’m supposed to love something more than that precious little girl. How is my sister supposed to love anything more than her tiny daughter?
Jesus’ claim truly is radical, and it’s very, very hard. But what it boils down to is a warning against idolatry. It’s an old-fashioned kind of word, but a challenge that is still very present in our lives today. To place anyone or any thing above God is to make an idol out of it. It’s one thing to admire or cherish someone. It’s another thing, a much more dangerous thing, to put a person on a pedestal, to revere him or her in such a way as to create inequality between ourselves and that person. This not only does a disservice to ourselves, it also does harm to the object of our admiration because it prevents us from seeing them for who they really are. Idolatry keeps us from having true authenticity in our relationships. If we can keep God in God’s rightful place in our lives, then it actually frees us up to to live into our relationships with the people we love even more deeply.
We live in a world that tells us we have to choose, and if we want to place one thing at the top of our list, then inevitably everything else must be less important. If we put God at the top, then our spouses or children or parents or friends must be less important to us. But our generous and abundant God doesn’t operate that way. Focusing on God doesn’t leave us with less time to focus on those we love, but rather gives us the gift of better vision and hearing with those people we cherish so we can love them even more deeply for who they truly are.
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
Extra, extra, read all about it! Stress can be nudged out the door...
Jane Brody, the
wise and wonderful health writer from the New York Times, wrote a column
yesterday that is really worth reading. Please do. I've posted a link to it
below. She starts her piece, called When Daily Stress Gets in the Way of Life,
with this little story on herself:
Anxiety is a fact of life. I've yet to meet anyone, no matter how upbeat, who has escaped anxious moments, days, even weeks. Recently, I succumbed when, rushed for time just before a Thanksgiving trip, I was told the tires on my car were too worn to be driven on safely and had to be replaced.
"But I have no time to do this now," I whined.
"Do you have time for an accident?" my car-savvy neighbor asked.
So, with a pounding heart and no idea how I'd make up the lost time, I went off to get new tires...It seems like such a small thing now. But everyday stresses add up...
She continues in this
smart column to coach us into acknowledging our own stresses, major and minor, and into taking
small, doable corrective steps that have big impacts. You can tap the link to Jane's Times column at the bottom of this posting.
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Patient Waiting
My husband, Joe, has called me the Queen of "yes...but what if?" What if such and such happens, or doesn't happen? Yes, it's sunny now, but what if that cloud way over there on the horizon brings rain to ruin our outdoor plans? Yes, the plane flight is going smoothly, but what if we run into turbulence?" You know the drill, I imagine.
It's all about control, I have decided. If I can think up all the things that can possibly happen in any given situation, then maybe, somehow, I can control the outcome, or at least be prepared for it, whatever it may be. It is a real discipline for me to try to release my grip on the steering wheel and just wait - patiently wait to let the situation spin itself out - to let God in on things!
We spend so much of our time waiting, don't we? Waiting in line at the store, waiting for that all-important correspondence, waiting for test results, waiting to hear about how that job interview went, waiting to hear the key in the door to let us know that a loved one has made it home through the ice storm. Waiting is not easy for me, as I think it probably is not easy for most people. Our minds can race to the worst possible scenario in a flash. One of the things I am working on this Advent is the art of patient waiting. I am trying to focus the passion of my fertile little mind's need to outguess the fates toward just "letting go and letting God," as the bumper sticker says. How can we hear God when the noise of our own impatience and worry drowns God out?
So for today, I will try to set aside my "yes...buts" and listen with open ear to God's requests, to God's plan. Now if I can just let go of that death grip on the steering wheel...
Advent peace to you all,
Audrey
It's all about control, I have decided. If I can think up all the things that can possibly happen in any given situation, then maybe, somehow, I can control the outcome, or at least be prepared for it, whatever it may be. It is a real discipline for me to try to release my grip on the steering wheel and just wait - patiently wait to let the situation spin itself out - to let God in on things!
We spend so much of our time waiting, don't we? Waiting in line at the store, waiting for that all-important correspondence, waiting for test results, waiting to hear about how that job interview went, waiting to hear the key in the door to let us know that a loved one has made it home through the ice storm. Waiting is not easy for me, as I think it probably is not easy for most people. Our minds can race to the worst possible scenario in a flash. One of the things I am working on this Advent is the art of patient waiting. I am trying to focus the passion of my fertile little mind's need to outguess the fates toward just "letting go and letting God," as the bumper sticker says. How can we hear God when the noise of our own impatience and worry drowns God out?
So for today, I will try to set aside my "yes...buts" and listen with open ear to God's requests, to God's plan. Now if I can just let go of that death grip on the steering wheel...
Advent peace to you all,
Audrey
Monday, December 10, 2012
Many Marys
Much though it would shock my departed Irish Catholic grandmother to hear it, I sometimes struggle with Mary (sorry Nanny Moughty!). My salvation in this struggle is that there are so many different versions of Mary the Mother of Christ to which we can turn. Are we looking toward a terrified, teenage, unwed mother? Or is it the steadfast woman standing at the foot of the cross? Are we thinking of the Guadalupana of Latin American heritage? Or the one with the Immaculate Heart? It seems like the conceptions of Mary to which we can turn are almost endless.
The facet of Mary that Nouwen discusses in today’s reading is actually the one I struggle with the most. The super, extra virginal Mary. The utterly sinless, immaculate Mary. The Mary that history has told women we must be more like...an impossible combination of virgin and mother. A perfect parent who never finds herself at wits end with her son. This Mary seems superhuman and unrelatable to me (but if she works for you, go with it).
The image of Mary that I am most drawn to is the one that comes from our Eastern Orthodox brothers and sisters - the image of theotokos - the “God-bearer.” Mary is the one that bears God into a hungry and desperate world. I can never aspire to the kind of perfection that is placed on the Immaculate Mary, but I can hope to be like the theotokos, bearing my experience of God to others.
Is there an image of Mary that particularly resonates with you? Or perhaps a way that you bear God into the world?
Saturday, December 8, 2012
Roadblocks
We know about feeling thwarted, don't we? Thwarted is an Old English word that sounds a bit like what it means....stopped, stymied, frustrated. Twharted-ness can be as simple as not getting into the restaurant you'd planned on, or as startling as a job falling apart, as sad as a dream disappearing. As small as the bridge being up and a big as a rejection in love.
Our writer, Henri Nouwen asks us on Day 7 of Advent to consider if we are thwarting God's access to our attention, access to our hearts. He points to big things like anger and greed as roadblocks that keep us from getting near to God. We can easily see how an obsessive anger or a consuming greed might well deafen us to the calls of better angels.
But Henri suggests that we thrwart God's access to our hearts in many smaller ways, through the distractions and absorptions of our days, small things that cummulatively leave little time and space for God to break into our hearts and heads. I can sure think of a few of my own, and I suspect you know what yours are, as well.
One healthy thing that seems to happen when we let God come near...many of our own feelings of being thwarted seem to get put in their place, and routes ahead appear.
Today, I plan to take down a roadblock or two. Join me?
Our writer, Henri Nouwen asks us on Day 7 of Advent to consider if we are thwarting God's access to our attention, access to our hearts. He points to big things like anger and greed as roadblocks that keep us from getting near to God. We can easily see how an obsessive anger or a consuming greed might well deafen us to the calls of better angels.
But Henri suggests that we thrwart God's access to our hearts in many smaller ways, through the distractions and absorptions of our days, small things that cummulatively leave little time and space for God to break into our hearts and heads. I can sure think of a few of my own, and I suspect you know what yours are, as well.
One healthy thing that seems to happen when we let God come near...many of our own feelings of being thwarted seem to get put in their place, and routes ahead appear.
Today, I plan to take down a roadblock or two. Join me?
Friday, December 7, 2012
The Blessing of Community
How very blessed we are to belong to the wonderful community of St. Alban's! There is so much joy here, so much genuine affection for one another, so much willingness to share not only our good times, but also our times of difficulty and sadness.
The next time you come into the Parish Hall be sure to stop and look at the "moving picture show" that is on display on the table in the entryway. What a good time we are having together in these pictures! We are worshiping together, enjoying delicious food together, talking to each other, working together, and always it seems, laughing together. We truly enjoy being in each other's company. This is so wonderful and, I think, quite rare. It is not always thus in church communities, or in any kind of community.
It take work to achieve what we have here. It takes individuals who are anxious to welcome any and all who cross our threshold. It takes people who are willing to share their stories and to listen to others' stories. It takes patience and forbearance and compassion. It takes hearts that can rejoice in each other and in God's love which, to my eye anyway, abounds here at St. Alban's. Thanks be to God for that extravagant love!
And thanks to Marjorie and Stacy for that exhilarating picture show!
Advent peace to you all,
Audrey
The next time you come into the Parish Hall be sure to stop and look at the "moving picture show" that is on display on the table in the entryway. What a good time we are having together in these pictures! We are worshiping together, enjoying delicious food together, talking to each other, working together, and always it seems, laughing together. We truly enjoy being in each other's company. This is so wonderful and, I think, quite rare. It is not always thus in church communities, or in any kind of community.
It take work to achieve what we have here. It takes individuals who are anxious to welcome any and all who cross our threshold. It takes people who are willing to share their stories and to listen to others' stories. It takes patience and forbearance and compassion. It takes hearts that can rejoice in each other and in God's love which, to my eye anyway, abounds here at St. Alban's. Thanks be to God for that extravagant love!
And thanks to Marjorie and Stacy for that exhilarating picture show!
Advent peace to you all,
Audrey
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Diet for the Soul
It is dangerous to drive past Whole Foods on your commute. It means that I frequently find myself stopping there after a long day of work for a fast, ready-made dinner from their salad/soup/hot bar. I tell myself that while I may be busting my budget doing so, at least it’s healthy/organic/local etc. Like lots of folks, I’m trying to make healthier more conscious choices about what I eat. And when you shop at the Whole Foods, you find yourself surrounded by folks who think it’s really important to pay attention to what you put into your body.
What if we took the same care with what we put into our minds? And our souls? It was 1992 when Nouwen wrote this excerpt mentioning the “garbage” of advertisements, tv, and radio. I mean, we’re talking pre-reality tv days. I wonder what Nouwen would say about our media consumption today? I’ll admit to watching reality tv myself (HGTV design shows anyone?), but I’ll also admit that I feel much more rested, refreshed, and renewed if I spend that time with a good book or, better yet, saying a portion of the daily office (and you can helpfully find it all put together for you here!). Today’s reading reminds me that how I feel is all about the care I take and the choices I make about what to put into my mind and soul.
What if we took the same care with what we put into our minds? And our souls? It was 1992 when Nouwen wrote this excerpt mentioning the “garbage” of advertisements, tv, and radio. I mean, we’re talking pre-reality tv days. I wonder what Nouwen would say about our media consumption today? I’ll admit to watching reality tv myself (HGTV design shows anyone?), but I’ll also admit that I feel much more rested, refreshed, and renewed if I spend that time with a good book or, better yet, saying a portion of the daily office (and you can helpfully find it all put together for you here!). Today’s reading reminds me that how I feel is all about the care I take and the choices I make about what to put into my mind and soul.
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
First things first
Day 4's four offerings all point me toward one question...In all the freedom I've been given, what is the first thing I best do? There may be many days in our weeks when we don't feel particularly free to make chocies beacuse the school bus is coming, the memo is due, the appointment is scheduled. But I am reminded by today's readings that if I can just take a grounding moment, a centering moment and a deep breath, some clarity comes about my proper first thing in the midst of all the second and third and fourth things. Nouwen wants us to find a first moment for a prayer of thanks for the truth that we are loved by God.
OK, so here goes...I've taken my breath and that moment of thanks first thing in this day. And what do I now discover? That I have another moment to give thanks for other things, that, as I tie my shoes, I can offer a prayer for a new baby in the parish, that I can take a moment and truly listen to an idea of my partner or a sibling on the phone, that I can ask God for some particular help...somehow making a first moment for a prayer of thanks for God's love actually leads me into other prayers and into the inevitable second and third and fourth things of the day. In a short prayer of thanks we are graced to first ground all our realties in our grateful relationship with God.
First things first. Have a great day! Tim+
OK, so here goes...I've taken my breath and that moment of thanks first thing in this day. And what do I now discover? That I have another moment to give thanks for other things, that, as I tie my shoes, I can offer a prayer for a new baby in the parish, that I can take a moment and truly listen to an idea of my partner or a sibling on the phone, that I can ask God for some particular help...somehow making a first moment for a prayer of thanks for God's love actually leads me into other prayers and into the inevitable second and third and fourth things of the day. In a short prayer of thanks we are graced to first ground all our realties in our grateful relationship with God.
First things first. Have a great day! Tim+
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
Tuesday, December 4, 2012 The 3rd day of Advent
The readings for today really hit home, I can tell you! Quiet and solitude don't come very easily for me; I always feel as if I should be doing something. My mind goes in so many different directions at once these days...who is left on my Christmas list? Can I possibly avoid the Mall this week? What in heaven's name will I have for dinner? Allowing ourselves some solitude amid the frenzy of this time of year is difficult, there is no getting around it. But that is what this lovely season of Advent asks of us - to be still, to be quiet, to cherish some "alone time" to listen to what God may be whispering to us.
"Lord, grant [us] a taste for solitude." Not a bad little prayer! Can we make it our own?
With love and peace to you all,
Audrey
Monday, December 3, 2012
Day 2 of Advent
“Don’t plan too precisely, however; leave room for God’s input.”
Sunday, December 2, 2012
Day 1 of Advent
Greetings, friends,
On this first day of Advent, Henri Nouwen encourgaes us to watch for the small signs of God's action in our lives.One extra thought I'd like to offer to our readings for today...let's use both our memories of things past AND our imaginiations of thing to come to see those small things. What small grace do you recall? What small gift do you imagine tomorrow might hold? Blessings,
Tim+
On this first day of Advent, Henri Nouwen encourgaes us to watch for the small signs of God's action in our lives.One extra thought I'd like to offer to our readings for today...let's use both our memories of things past AND our imaginiations of thing to come to see those small things. What small grace do you recall? What small gift do you imagine tomorrow might hold? Blessings,
Tim+
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