Mystery

Day three of this new book, and I'm already finding it more challenging than our Advent reader.  At the same time, I think I'm also finding it more rewarding.  It took me a few minutes to realize that the design of this book is different from our last one in that it has two Nouwen passages paired together rather than a Nouwen passage and a commentary from the editor.

And today I'm struck by the tension that's held between these two passages from two different books by Henri.  The first part focuses on the incarnation, the very realness and presence of Jesus in our world, the historical fact of the man we believe wasn't only a man.  The second portion focuses on the absence of God.

Wait...what?  The absence of God?  Didn't Henri Nouwen go to Sunday School?  Doesn't he know that God is everywhere?!

But Nouwen goes on to point out that God "transcends our psychological distinctions between 'already' and 'not yet,' absence and presence, leaving and returning." In each of these opposing pairs, God gets to be both at the same time.  This is one of those concepts that has me utterly convinced that scientific advances are actually bringing science and faith closer together, not further apart.  This notion of a flexibility in time and space that is beyond that which a human can experience is part of what's at the heart of the theory of relativity.  Sometimes I think the line between theory and belief is actually a pretty blurry one.

So what does it mean to focus on God's simultaneous presence and absence?  What does that look like experientially?  Practically, I think the easiest way to focus on God's presence in any given moment is to find the thing(s) for which you are grateful.  Gratitude is one emotional fast-track to God.  In the same moment, to focus on God's absence it to go to a place of emotional uncertainty, and wait there in peace.  For example, in this moment I can look out my office window and focus on God's presence by being grateful for the particular kind of rosy glow the setting sun is giving the trees on Cushing Island.  And in this moment, I can also focus on God's absence by thinking about the things in my life that provoke the most anxiety, the things about which I have the least amount of certainty.  And rather than giving in to that uncertainty and getting overwhelmed by it, I could choose to sit with it.  And in that way, I can try and befriend mystery and learn to tolerate the uncertainty with which our society is becoming less and less comfortable.

I think this comfort with mystery is at the heart of the Descending Way of Lent and life.

Invitations and Parties

I invite you, therefore, in the name of the Church, to the

observance of a holy Lent, by self-examination and repentance;

by prayer, fasting, and self-denial; and by reading and

meditating on God's holy Word.

-BCP, pg 265 

As a child, I never liked going to Ash Wednesday services.  I used to refer to it as "the creepiest day of the church year."  The Ash Wednesday liturgy involves so much intense and gloomy-sounding language...Ash Wednesday always seemed even darker than Good Friday.  And knowing that it was the kick-off for the season of Lent, the whole season of Lent seemed dark and gloomy as well.

What appeals to me about our reading from Nouwen today is the way it speaks of joy and light.  Here we are, on just the second day of Lent, and good old Henri is telling us to choose life.  Jesus is telling us to choose light.

The invitation to the observance of Lent from the Book of Common Prayer speaks of a season of self-examination, repentance, fasting, self-denial, prayer, and study.  That can read like a very gloomy list.  But that list is not the point of Lent.  Fasting is not the point of Lent.  Self-denial isn't what Lent is all about.  These are some of the modes, but they are not the actual expression.

What Lent is about is preparation.  We're spending 40 days getting ready for the feast.  It's kind of like throwing a dinner party.  But before you can get to the actual party, you have to put in the work.  You have to plan and shop and pick the right recipes and put in the time and clean the house.  And all that work can feel burdensome, or all that work can feel exciting.  If you don't prepare well, you're running around at the last minute and may be too tired to actually enjoy the event.  But if you're well prepared, you can enjoy the feast with friends and be truly present to that moment and those relationships.

That's Lent and Easter.  And our time of preparation doesn't have to be gloomy.  Nouwen's suggestion that we focus on gratitude is a direct line to making us more aware of God's presence in our lives and doing so in a deeply joyful way.  We can either take this suggestion or not.  We can choose joy and gratitude, light and life, or we can choose something else.  How do you want to plan your party?

Ash Wednesday basics...

Have you ever given a swimming lesson..or taken one?

If so, you'll remember that when the new swimmer is anxious, shivering, taking short breathes while holding every muscle taut, it's nearly impossible to float. The body as a tightened, closed ball sinks gracelessly into the water. 

But if the new swimmer is able to stand tall and spread her arms, take a deep breath or two and then calmly step into the pool at a warm, shallow place and lay back, using all the natural bouyancy of the body and the support of the water, she is able to float and breathe and then slowly move her hands. Relaxing one's muscles and stretching open one's body leads to breathing deeply and finding yourself afloat. The swimmer swims.

Grace is a lot like that...a natural bouyancy. A counter-force to the posture of tightness, closedness, denial, fear, troubled...the posture that sinks us.

There's quite a bit of talk of sin in today's worship and in Henri Nowen's moving opening words.

Henri seems to suggest that we're paralyzed by the guilt we feel over our sins. That may be true.
But if our sin is essentially a disharmony between our choices and God's hopes, I think we're more likely paralyzed by our defense of our turf, our posture of tightness and control, our self-focused denial of God's grace and distrust that God's hopes have us in their frame.

Paralyzed we sink gracelessly below the waterline.

Lent is a time to be new swimmers...looking clearly at our choices while taking deep, wholesome breaths and trusting in the bouyancy of  Grace.

Tim+

2013 Daily Lenten Readings begin Wednesday

Welcome. We will all be enjoying daily lenten readings from Henri J.M. Nouwen's book Show Me the Way.

The clergy will be offering their daily perspective and we encourage you all to add comments. If anybody would like assistance on this, please feel free to contact me directly at joanne.olsen@gmail.com.